On this Friday afternoon, about half an hour before I dive into preparing for the Sabbath, I have no photographs--just words.
I have noticed recently that it is getting harder and harder to pay attention to my schoolwork and do a productive, decent quality job on it. Having thought the matter through, I have managed to identify one cause: sleep, or rather lack thereof.
Let me be clear: I am still getting quantity sleep. What I am not getting, and probably simply won't manage until I teach my lesson plan and therefore stay in the school program, is quality sleep. All the sleep in the world won't make a bit of difference if it isn't deep and relaxing enough.
Since I cannot force myself to relax and get deep sleep at night, I have found I must rest somewhere, somehow, during the day. On days home all day, that's simple enough: after I have done the truly critical school stuff for that day I simply tuck myself into bed for an hour to an hour and a half. Days involving leaving and going out and about are more difficult, but I still try for this rest. Also critical is that for the moment, until I am sleeping better at night (when one is supposed to sleep, just saying!) I am "dividing and conquering" the schoolwork: more, shorter sessions rather than one or two long ones.
In other news, tomorrow I go to synagogue again! I discovered last week that I will truly, truly only last for an hour of the service due to chronic pain. (I do NOT feel sorry for myself, AT ALL: going to that synagogue in the first place is enough of a miracle, but facing facts means facing facts.) The more critical parts of the service--the technically required parts--start about 45 minutes in. Henceforth, I time my experience there to coincide with these parts of the service. Additionally, tomorrow is a Bat Mitzvah; I should be able to snag kippah #56.
This summer, I am getting one more warm weather synagogue outfit. I'm quite excited; I don't get new clothes very often. However, I currently go to synagogue every week, alternating between only two outfits (a purple and orange floral blouse and skirt or a blue dress with lace down the front). That's not enough. For the upcoming skirt, which I have to buy in person because I do not know my size and anyway skirt sizes change across brands, I am going back to the Orthodox Jewish clothing store about half an hour walk from my undergrad where I bought seven of the skirts I own now. I am more comfortable buying the blouse online because shirt sizes are more consistent. Regardless, I would be buying the blouse in a "normal" store; I have no use for Orthodox-style tops.
I have agreed to sleep over at JS's place over Memorial Day weekend. I'm quite excited and I definitely want to; the only reason this is weird is that he still lives with his parents. But I've met his parents before, I'm comfortable with them, and hey--if he wants me, he wants me.
The only thing left to share is to tell about my current sewing project. I am making a patchwork throw pillow for my "religion" chair: my rocker, turned to face East, and really only used for religious purposes. The pillow is going to be six squares across and six squares down, in three different materials: black with a small gray floral, a big brown print, and delicate pastel pink stripes with small flowers strewn over. I have a material I might use for the back, if I have enough of it; otherwise I'm going to have to buy a piece for the back. The patches started out four inches each side; so I suppose the pillow will be 24 inches each side. That's bigger than I pictured, but will actually fit the chair well. I love making things to beautify my religious practice, and it's been a long time since I did.
SHABBAT SHALOM EVERYONE!
Welcome!
"Don't tell God how big your storm is; tell your storm how big your God is."
I believe in God.
I believe in God.
Friday, April 12, 2019
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About Me
- free_to_dream
- I am a bipolar, Jewish young adult (had my Hebrew birthday, the one I count, and turned 23 this past January) who also suffers from Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy. I love life and I live for my best friends: they are my purpose and my reason for trying so hard. I remain passionately devoted to those I love; I will not let my disorders make me totally self-centered. I like to read, write, and sew. My Rabbinical school plans did not work out, and I am now hoping to go into the field of Early Childhood Education. Please note: I am currently maintaining only Carried in His Hands. Enjoy!
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