Reactions

So, Friday night, I got two reactions to my tzitziot.  One was a man doing the adult equivalent of staring: I watched his gaze travel the length of them when he came into synagogue.  The other was from the Rabbi's daughter, "Leah" (I cannot get consent for real names from that family because I can never tell them about this blog: they would learn that I am bisexual, and they would also read bad things about themselves, and I can't let either of those things happen): she asked the tefillin question.

I was so, so glad I had mentally role played, over and over again, how to answer that question, because I was able to calmly answer truthfully.  Then she took it one step further.  She asked, "Don't you know it's forbidden for women to put on tefillin? Don't you follow Jewish law?" In the moment, the best response I could think of was something about how, in the Conservative movement, Jewish law changes over time; and I used ordaining female Rabbis as my example.  Poor, sheltered "Leah" did not know there were female Rabbis, at all, anywhere! It would be one thing for her not to approve of female Rabbis...but not to know they exist?