"Don't tell God how big your storm is; tell your storm how big your God is."

I believe in God.

Sunday, November 10, 2013

Letting Loose

I have decided to let my tzitziot hang loose for the world to see.  The general idea behind the commandment is to see them, and how can I see them if they are tucked in? Besides, tucking them in was getting to be a nuisance.  I don't want my beautiful mitzvah to feel like a nuisance.

I'm not afraid of the reactions I'll get.  I am aware of the fact that I will get a broad range, everything from "You go girl!" to "Take them off."  I have been "The Girl in a Kippah" since freshman year; this is just one more step.

Also, my life has been majorly affected by demons recently.  Monday night I actually fought a couple of little ones who wanted to attach to me.  For two or three days following, there was something wrong with the boundary between us and them.  I didn't pay much attention to it; it was a fact kind of like the sky's blueness. 

Lastly, I think I may have caught a glimpse of their king, unless I was imagining things at the time, which that time I might have been.  Sometimes it's hard to tell.

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I am a bipolar, Jewish young adult (had my Hebrew birthday, the one I count, and turned 23 this past January) who also suffers from Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy. I love life and I live for my best friends: they are my purpose and my reason for trying so hard. I remain passionately devoted to those I love; I will not let my disorders make me totally self-centered. I like to read, write, and sew. My Rabbinical school plans did not work out, and I am now hoping to go into the field of Early Childhood Education. Please note: I am currently maintaining only Carried in His Hands. Enjoy!