Carried in His Hands

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"Don't tell God how big your storm is; tell your storm how big your God is."

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Tuesday, August 6, 2019

My Newest FOUR Kippot!

The picture below has FOUR kippot, bringing my collection up to...I think...SIXTY ONE.  There is a cactus print one from kidskippot  (Etsy seller; also did my penguins), a royal blue canvas from a Bar Mitzvah, a red "Bar Mitzvah Beanie," and a lavender "Bat Mitzvah Beanie."  The beanies were collected for me by my grandmother.  Oh, and I broke up with JS.  The relationship really wasn't working...and, although his family disagrees with me, it really was time to move on.


Wednesday, June 12, 2019

The Big Trip

Two weekends ago, JS and I went on a big trip: we took a bus to Washington, DC to tour Smithsonians.  Smithsonians have free admission, and I do not spend money on the Sabbath.  Overall, we saw three museums and part of a fourth: zoo on Friday, where we looked at elephants (Asian, for those of you who care about the difference) and primates; and American Indian, Air and Space, and Natural History, all on Saturday.  There is so much in Natural History--and we only just got a chance to peek around--so if we do this trip again, we are going to start there.  Their Hall of Human Origins alone was fantastic.

If you have been reading this blog for any length of time, you know that I have spinal cord stimulators implanted.  What you probably do not know is that I really shouldn't go through metal detectors.  Two of the three Saturday museums were more or less fine with this, though you could see they were taken aback and improvising how to let me through and prove that I was safe; however Air and Space almost did not want to believe that I had them in the first place.  That is so demeaning--did they really think I would invent something like that? To make matters worse, they had sent my bag through the x-ray while keeping me separate, so I couldn't even access my things.

It must have been fury that kept me calm as I said, "In my bag is a card that can prove this, if you will let me have my bag."  Fortunately at that point they let me take my bag and enter the museum, but I was so glad I had brought the card (ID/proof from the company) just in case.

Ironically enough, I think of the three museums of which we managed to do as much as we wanted--zoo, American Indian, and Air and Space--Air and Space was my favorite.  Such detailed, impressive exhibits, including on the Bleriot planes.  (Bleriot was a famous, pioneering pilot, French I think; my family had a picture book about him when I was small.)

And I forgot to take any relevant pictures, so I have none to add here.

I am not saying the weekend was perfect--it wasn't; we were getting to know each other even better than we already do, and love is never perfect--but it was memorable, and JS and I will cherish the memories forever.

Sunday, May 19, 2019

Proudly Displaying Kippot, Part Seven of Seven

This is the final post in this series, my "earth tones" kippot: my blacks, whites, grays, browns, and the occasional metallic.  There are eight of them.

This one is plain gold raw silk, a very simple Yair Emanuel design.  When I need to get really close to God, and it feels safe, I wear this one: in ways I don't understand, it makes it easier to form a spiritual connection with God.

This is a black velvet from my younger brother's Bar Mitzvah.  Fun fact: I had to sew most of the lining back on myself.  The stitches are black, and they disappear into the velvet, which is nice.  And no, I do not have one from my older brother's Bar Mitzvah.  I was only nine, and not collecting yet.

This is a white "wedding beanie" given to me by my ex boyfriend.  A white one is very convenient: I can wear it to synagogue on Yom Kippur, when it is traditional to wear white; and in the meantime, it matches with other things.  This coming Sabbath is time to wear my pink and white synagogue outfit again; I'm toying with the idea of wearing this kippah (with pink flowered clips), to match the skirt.

Free with my older brother's Bar Mitzvah prayer shawl, by designer Gabrieli.  I "rescued" this one from a laundry basket a few summers ago.

Actual US military issue, from the last set of uniforms (the digital camo ones).  I had to sew this one's lining back on too, and the stitches did not disappear as well.

Actual ultra-Orthodox style.  I originally bought this one to thumb my nose at the ultra-Orthodox, as a woman wearing one of "their" kippot.  No one gets the joke.  Ultra-Orthodox Jews who see me wearing it just think it's a kippah, because they've never seen any different; and the people who might appreciate the joke don't recognize this as ultra-Orthodox style.  Anyway, this one has a much more serious purpose: I now wear it on days of Jewish tragedy (Holocaust Remembrance Day and Israel's Memorial Day), as well as on fast days other than Yom Kippur.

Made in Uganda! Uganda's Jewish community makes these and other handicrafts as fundraisers for various community projects.  Last I heard, they were raising money to build a synagogue, with a daycare center so that for the first time mothers could be something more; however, that was many years ago, so they might have completed that project by now.  At one point, I was considering spending a year at their Rabbinical school; I would have been the only woman to stick it out and the first White student ever.  Mainly due to maintenance of my bipolar disorder, this plan did not work out; this kippah makes that sting a little less.  In point of fact, this is the one I am wearing today, with a "brown tones" (long brown skirt, T-shirt tie dyed in shades of brown) outfit.

My "Kol Nidre" kippah! Kol Nidre is the beginning prayer service of Yom Kippur, Day of Atonement.  This one is big enough to be a holiday evening hat, and it is mainly white, the color of Yom Kippur.  I found this one in my family's drawer; no one was wearing it, so I claimed it.  And yes, I really do only wear this one on Yom Kippur evening, so just one night a year.

Saturday, May 18, 2019

Proudy Displaying Kippot, Part Six of Seven

Here you see my purple kippot; there are only four of them, but because purple is my favorite color, they are truly treasured.  The last one shown in this entry is my absolute favorite, out of all 57.  And yes, that number stands at 57; I did not snag one at today's Bat Mitzvah because today's Bat Mitzvah kippot were almost identical to one I already had (second one shown in the blue entry, in case anyone is interested), and a collection of 57 is quite large enough without duplicates.

This is the "weekday" (meaning not Friday/holiday evening hats) one that I consider prettiest.  It is hand painted silk by designer Yair Emanuel.  The background was supposed to be blue, but that's OK; I think it's prettier this way anyway, and it is a perfect match for my orange-and-purple, warm-weather synagogue outfit.  In point of fact, I wore that outfit, with this kippah, to synagogue today.

Number 57, my most recent, picked up at last week's Bat Mitzvah.  Nice to have a Bat Mitzvah freebie made of high quality material, and not in blue!

"Bat Mitzvah Beanie" picked up for me by my father, at the B'not Mitzvah of twin girls.  The other one from those two girls is my pink "Bat Mitzvah Beanie."

And my "Birds in Color" hand embroidered hat, designed by Yair Emanuel! This was my high school graduation present, and remains my favorite.

Friday, May 17, 2019

Proudly Displaying Kippot, Part Five of Seven

Today I show you my blue kippot.  I own more blue kippot than any other single color.  (Only my "business" stack has more, 24, and those are all different colors, united by size.  Blue is my most represented individual color.)  This is because blue seems to be the most popular color for freebies at B'nei Mitzvah.  ("B'nei Mitzvah" is the grammatically correct Hebrew plural for more than one Bar Mitzvah, or for a mixed gender grouping of more than one Bar and Bat Mitzvah.)  Most of my blue stack--I think all except three--were picked up at these types of events.

Two additional notes before I show you my collection of blue: number one, tomorrow evening when I show you my purples you will finally see the one I picked up at last week's Bat Mitzvah.  Tomorrow is another Bat Mitzvah, and I intend to pick up another freebie, #58 in my collection.  I will work out how best to show it to you when I actually know what it looks like.  And number two, I think I have picked out my kippot for my trip with JS at the end of the month.  I intend to wear my cactus print kippah (for the first time!) Friday the 31st.  I intend to wear the one JS bought me as a birthday gift (shown in this post) Saturday June 1st, and I think I will wear my penguin print kippah Sunday June 2nd.

Anyway.  See blue kippot below.

This is one I picked up at a Bat Mitzvah at my current synagogue.  Just counting my freebie kippot, I seem to have been to 12 B'nei Mitzvah there so far.

I actually picked up this one at a Bat Mitzvah hosted at my undergrad.  (Parents were alumni.)  This was only my second blue one (who could dream that stack would grow to 10?) so I was happy to have it.  It was handmade by the Bat Mitzvah family, and it has its own internal clip...which I've never figured out how to work, but it's there.

Freebie from a Bat Mitzvah at my current synagogue.  This is really a high end freebie.  It's hard to see in the picture, but it is crocheted; as discussed yesterday, crocheted kippot, in bulk, do not come cheap.

This is the one JS bought me for my birthday! I picked it out and he paid for it; I think he figured I was more likely to get what I wanted that way, rather than if he tried to pick it out and surprised me.  JS wants me to pick out a new one for him for his birthday (in six months).  He's been wearing the same one for 10 years, and it I falling apart.  Somehow he does not trust himself to shop for this himself.  After going back and forth with him for a few days, I think we have settled on Superman as the motif.

Picked up from a Bat Mitzvah at my local synagogue.  I had some kind of sickness that day and couldn't stay, so I saw none of the service (not even the beginning parts typically led by someone other than the Bat Mitzvah girl), but I wanted to keep it anyway.

This is an embroidered silk by Yair Emanuel.  It is the second of three purchased blue ones; and it was my first, and for a long time only, blue one.

Free from a Bat Mitzvah at my local synagogue, a fairly recent one though I don't remember the exact date (and yes, it is the style referred to in my family as the "Bat Mitzvah Beanie")...

Free from a Bar Mitzvah at my synagogue (so a "Bar Mitzvah Beanie")...

Free from a Bar Mitzvah at my synagogue.  (Another "Bar Mitzvah Beanie!")

A spectacular, hand embroidered hat by designer Yair Emanuel.  I wanted this one for literally years before I managed to actually acquire it.  This was part of my college graduation gift (along with my penguins kippah and my Sabbath/holiday candelabrum).  It is supposed to portray Jerusalem; while I don't like wearing Jerusalem, this hat is so stylized no one would know, so it's OK.  The truly fabulous part, which unfortunately you cannot see in this picture, is the rim; a series of buildings is embroidered all around, with none of them repeating.

Thursday, May 16, 2019

Proudly Displaying Kippah, Part Four of Seven

You read that correctly: in this post, there is only one, single, solitary kippah.  This is because I am up to the green color group, a vastly underrepresented color in my collection.  There is only one green one that is not in the "business" stack, and you saw the "business" one (green and yellow, hand crocheted) in the first of this series of posts.

I picked this one up at a Bar Mitzvah at my current synagogue about two and a half years ago.  It feels weird to have been living an adult life long enough to have done ANYTHING two and a half years ago, but there you are.  This is a remarkably nice Bar Mitzvah kippah: crocheted kippot do not come cheap.  Moreover, this particular Bar Mitzvah had them in two color schemes.  There was the green and off-white you see here, and there was also a gorgeous blue and purple.  I honestly thought the blue and purple were prettier, but in terms of diversifying my collection, I needed the one shown here more.

Another note about kippot: JS and I are taking a mini-getaway-vacation together May 31-June 2.  (Yes, if he's comfortable with it and I remember my camera, there will be pictures.)  I am still debating which kippot to wear: I want the most important part of each outfit (and I do pick my kippot most carefully and consider them the most important thing I wear each day) to be as special as the trip itself.  Right now, I'm thinking of debuting my cactus kippah (ordering it Monday, should have it by the trip) on the first day, the Friday; and wearing the blue and pink floral one that JS bought me for my last birthday on the second day, the Saturday; still unsure which one for Sunday.  Possibly my bisexual pride one...


Wednesday, May 15, 2019

Proudly Displaying Kippot, Part Three of Seven

Today I will show you my kippot with red as the main color.  This is a very diverse stack in terms of style: the only unifying factor is color; otherwise, no two are alike.

This one is rather small and flimsy, but I still love it.  I bought it on Etsy; you can find almost anything--including many styles of handmade kippot--there.  There were several dragons available; I got the red one to complement undergrad university T-shirts.  I am planning to wear this one this Friday, with a gray skort to match the background, and a red top (undergrad university T-shirt, or plain polo shirt) to match the dragon itself, this Friday.

Another embroidered silk by designer Yair Emanuel.  I bought this one, even before the dragon, specifically to go with those red undergrad T-shirts.  It's quite useful, as I have three of those shirts and now also a plain red polo, plus a skirt I got specifically to go with them.

This is one of the four (five if you count the one I only wear to Yom Kippur evening services) that I wear on Sabbath and holiday evenings.  These are so big that I've seen them referred to as "hats" rather than kippot or yarmulkes by websites selling them.  This particular one was inherited form the family kippah drawer.

This is a machine embroidered silk--and therefore cheaper and less intricate than my hand embroidered ones (you'll see one of those with the blue stack and one with the purple stack)--by designer Yair Emanuel.  If I stick with my plan to wear gray and red on Friday, this is the one I'll be wearing Friday evening.

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I am a bipolar, Jewish young adult (had my Hebrew birthday, the one I count, and turned 23 this past January) who also suffers from Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy. I love life and I live for my best friends: they are my purpose and my reason for trying so hard. I remain passionately devoted to those I love; I will not let my disorders make me totally self-centered. I like to read, write, and sew. My Rabbinical school plans did not work out, and I am now hoping to go into the field of Early Childhood Education. Please note: I am currently maintaining only Carried in His Hands. Enjoy!