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"Don't tell God how big your storm is; tell your storm how big your God is."

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Saturday, October 24, 2015

I Can't Even Begin to Have Words

Friday afternoon, actually probably right around the time that I was blogging, a beautiful old synagogue downtown near my college caught fire.  No one was injured, and that is always absolutely the most important thing; however (at least this is what I hear) out of twenty Torah scrolls, they were only able to save four.

A Torah scroll is next thing to a human life.  It is written by hand, and can take up to a year and roughly thirty thousand dollars to produce.  The Torah is so close to being a life that there are those who will count it as the tenth person in a prayer quorum.

Still, even knowing all that didn't really bring the tragedy of the day home to me.  What really brought it home was when I was leaving Chabad after dinner, and saw city police carefully watching the building.  It was the second time that night that I had noticed them, and all of a sudden it clicked that the city was carefully protecting its Jews because no one was sure how this fire had started.

I'm very glad the city in which I spend most of my time cares enough to send personnel to make sure its people are all safe, but I wish to God it didn't have to!

I can't even begin to have words.

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I am a bipolar, Jewish young adult (had my Hebrew birthday, the one I count, and turned 23 this past January) who also suffers from Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy. I love life and I live for my best friends: they are my purpose and my reason for trying so hard. I remain passionately devoted to those I love; I will not let my disorders make me totally self-centered. I like to read, write, and sew. My Rabbinical school plans did not work out, and I am now hoping to go into the field of Early Childhood Education. Please note: I am currently maintaining only Carried in His Hands. Enjoy!