"Don't tell God how big your storm is; tell your storm how big your God is."

I believe in God.

Tuesday, July 9, 2013

When it rains, it pours...

So due to lack of sleep because of the pain, I have now entered a bipolar episode, or at least a tiny one.  My doctor does not want to treat the episode directly because I'm on so much medication already; and I take that seriously because she's big on medication.  What she did was prescribe a pain med that aids in slow-wave sleep, just to take at nighttime.

Last night, despite the new med (Lyrica, if that means anything to you), was hell.  I went to bed at 10:30-ish, got up at 11:30-ish, hung out with my roommates until midnight or so, fooled around on Facebook until 12:30-ish, and finally fell asleep around 1:00-ish.  Then I was up with my alarm around 7:00-ish.  I dealt with manic jitters this morning by taking my emergency low-dose Seroquel (I knew the Xanax would put me right to sleep again, and I have too much to do for that to be practical today), which made me way sleepy.  So I took extra caffeine, which I think is just starting to kick in as we speak.

Shout out to my roommates "Julie" and "Jessica" for handling me when I'm like this.  I felt really bad for them last night.  When "Julie" said something that wasn't even really amusing--more like mildly witty--and I was just sitting at the table losing control and laughing and laughing.  "Julie" was trying to calm me down, which was rather a lost cause at that point, and "Jessica" (a new roommate who has never lived with anyone who is bipolar before) was trying to take her cues from "Julie", which obviously wasn't working, and, well...not fun for any of us.  Anyway, thanks, girls, for putting up with me!

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I am a bipolar, Jewish young adult (had my Hebrew birthday, the one I count, and turned 23 this past January) who also suffers from Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy. I love life and I live for my best friends: they are my purpose and my reason for trying so hard. I remain passionately devoted to those I love; I will not let my disorders make me totally self-centered. I like to read, write, and sew. My Rabbinical school plans did not work out, and I am now hoping to go into the field of Early Childhood Education. Please note: I am currently maintaining only Carried in His Hands. Enjoy!