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"Don't tell God how big your storm is; tell your storm how big your God is."

I believe in God.

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Fluctuating Faith

Yesterday I said I trusted God completely through this episode, and yesterday I did. Today, however, it's harder.

I'm not sure why it's so hard for me to trust and believe today. My symptoms are no worse than yesterday's. I am still plagued by causeless anxiety, but not so much that I need the emergency fix of my as-needed anti-anxiety medication, and my noise thresholds might even be a little higher.

And, on the other hand, the irritability just kicked in again. However, although every day is hard, overall this episode is starting to dissipate. I should find strength and hope in that.

Also, just because I feel like it: Yelling for "Erin"! Yelling for "Erin"! YELLING FOR "ERIN"!

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I am a bipolar, Jewish young adult (had my Hebrew birthday, the one I count, and turned 23 this past January) who also suffers from Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy. I love life and I live for my best friends: they are my purpose and my reason for trying so hard. I remain passionately devoted to those I love; I will not let my disorders make me totally self-centered. I like to read, write, and sew. My Rabbinical school plans did not work out, and I am now hoping to go into the field of Early Childhood Education. Please note: I am currently maintaining only Carried in His Hands. Enjoy!