"Don't tell God how big your storm is; tell your storm how big your God is."

I believe in God.

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

My Quest

So as I believe I mentioned a couple days ago, I am on a quest to find a God in Whom I can believe without feeling like a hypocrite. To that end, I have started reading theology/philosophy, most of it Jewish, beginning with a book called The Many Faces of God. The book is comprised of excerpts from the works of many theologians and philosophers, mostly Jewish but not all.

I have read through the sections on two writers, Martin Buber and Mordechai Kaplan. Buber states that God can be found in community and in people helping one another; Kaplan's God is the force of good in the world. I find both to be inaccurate depictions.

Just a side note: In a couple of places, Buber almost literally described my visions etc. I thought that was fantastic, cool, and freaky because I have never encountered anyone who understood or had experienced that kind of stuff before. It's not that I ever thought I was the only one who could do this kind of stuff, but reading the writing of someone else who (probably) had had similar things happen to him was amazing.

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I am a bipolar, Jewish young adult (had my Hebrew birthday, the one I count, and turned 23 this past January) who also suffers from Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy. I love life and I live for my best friends: they are my purpose and my reason for trying so hard. I remain passionately devoted to those I love; I will not let my disorders make me totally self-centered. I like to read, write, and sew. My Rabbinical school plans did not work out, and I am now hoping to go into the field of Early Childhood Education. Please note: I am currently maintaining only Carried in His Hands. Enjoy!